- Apr 21, 2020
Nothing wrong at all with wanting feedback :) When I initially read that entry, my take was that it wasn't finished yet. I'd wait for the rest and then maybe comment on it if I had anything worth adding. I think I had that assumption just because it seemed shorter, maybe less fleshed out? I just got the feeling that you would talk about that aspect of her more.I have one thing that's bothering me, and I've been struggling with it today. In post 25, I told a story about my mom pulling some classic victim blaming. The post didn't get any reacts or comments, and yet it's the one I most wanted support for, even as I started this thread not seeking support so much as a method to explore and a platform for doing so. I'm uncomfortable saying I want support for that post, and in thinking about it today, I've come up with all sorts of defenses about why it's okay to ask for attention for that, as if I were preemptively defensive when no one has given me reason in this thread to feel like I have to validate my need or want.
So I'm going to be aware of my discomfort here, remind myself that vulnerability can be very rewarding, and make this request: Would someone please be so kind as to comment on their perspective of the story in post 25?
Anyone with any shred of empathy can see that your mom's response was psychotic and unnatural. She lied to someone who trusted her and couldnt have known better, then used that misinformation to hurt and blame them later... Just manipulating and hurting for the sole end goal of ???. 11 also seems like a far outlier of an age to let a child believe something like that intentionally. Maybe she continued because she liked to confirm her twisted view of:
"Haha, my daughter is flawed. She cant even realize the easter bunny isn't real! Anyone would treat her the way I do if they had to deal with her!"
I'm making big assumptions, but it's the type of mental gymnastics I'd expect from someone whose actions you've described.
As far as likes/reacts, that is new to me. I'm not used to thinking about how someone might want that confirmation on their post. I'ts pretty likely I will fail to be vigilant about it too, since I am forgetful and get lost in my thoughts about what their post/comment is about. But wanting some reassurance and/or insight is normal when talking about things this personal and guarded, so don't feel conceited for wanting that :)