Started Cutting

  • Welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, a pro-choice forum for the discussion of mental illness, suicide, and the moral implications of the act itself. We do not encourage or aid suicide, the information offered is for educational purposes only. For more information read our FAQ.
    For immediate help, consider calling the Samaritan's hotline: (877) 870-4673. Be aware they may call emergency services if they believe you are at imminent risk of death. We also have a recovery subforum if you wish to get support.
    You can close this box by clicking the top right "X".
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
I feel like I'm not cutting deep enough but also don't want to severely bleed out because I'm not in my own apartment and if I die it would be unfair to the returning tenants.

Is there a guide i can look at, and/or videos i can watch? i am using double edge razors as my knife barely worked.
 
  • Like
Reactions: TheCrow
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
I feel like I'm not cutting deep enough but also don't want to severely bleed out because I'm not in my own apartment and if I die it would be unfair to the returning tenants.

Is there a guide i can look at, and/or videos i can watch? i am using double edge razors as my knife barely worked.
I used to use a serrated knife. Oh wait a minute, you mean to ctb, not to cut. Hmm. Exacto knives are really sharp, I wonder how that would work. Also, you could bleed in the bathtub filled with water?
 
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
I used to use a serrated knife. Oh wait a minute, you mean to ctb, not to cut. Hmm. Exacto knives are really sharp, I wonder how that would work. Also, you could bleed in the bathtub filled with water?
i was in the hospital two nights ago because a crisis worker thought i was going to kill myself... still don't know where to cut or how deep, but i suppose i'm just doing it to feel pain for the next few months.
 
  • Like
Reactions: sif
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
like i cut, my arms have scars all over them now.
I’m sorry. I know what state of panic, sadness, anger, and hopeless goes into wanting to do that to yourself. If you can, try and find another outlet so that you don’t have to deal with the scars later. Can you smoke weed or something to just calm you down a little? Take the edge off?
 
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
I’m sorry. I know what state of panic, sadness, anger, and hopeless goes into wanting to do that to yourself. If you can, try and find another outlet so that you don’t have to deal with the scars later. Can you smoke weed or something to just calm you down a little? Take the edge off?
i suggested i start smoking weed again to my therapist last week but she advised against it. its been 11 months since i last smoked and idk if i can even find it. i never go out anymore or nothing
 
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
i suggested i start smoking weed again to my therapist last week but she advised against it. its been 11 months since i last smoked and idk if i can even find it. i never go out anymore or nothing
She’s probably afraid that you’re going to have an adverse reaction and flip the fuck out. But it can help with depression, anxiety, and a number of things. I hear you though, it can be hard to find someone to get it from when you don’t talk to anyone. Are they giving you any meds in the short term after this incident to help relax you?
 
21Neberg

21Neberg

Illuminated
Dec 17, 2018
1,559
7,737
Finally - a thread that's right up my alley!

Ah, the wonders of cutting. I too do it often, sometimes I feel like it's becoming an addiction haha. You mention that you want to commit suicide by cutting. I don't recommend that. This source: http://lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/statistics-most-lethal-methods shows that slitting your wrists has an incredibly low (6%) success rate, yet a very high (71) pain-rating. Find another method - we're happy to help you here.
 
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
She’s probably afraid that you’re going to have an adverse reaction and flip the fuck out. But it can help with depression, anxiety, and a number of things. I hear you though, it can be hard to find someone to get it from when you don’t talk to anyone. Are they giving you any meds in the short term after this incident to help relax you?
yes, i'm on wellbutrin.

i drink on occasion and it's fine, but i dont know how it will mix with marijuana. there are some horror stories about seizures but if alcohol isn't causing them, marijuana shouldn't.

i have a vapourizer i bought two months ago and i bought some weed online last night, as it's readily available and legal where i am. i should get it in a couple of days but im going to wait until friday night/saturday morning to ingest it
 
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
I like to cut. I like the look and feel of it. There's no right or wrong way to do it for coping purposes, and I would NOT recommend it for ctb!
today i almost vomitted on the bus thinking of slashing my arteries when i got home.... one reason i want to die because sometimes my thoughts are so fucking stupid and who knows what i may do to permanently injure myself or someone else (im not physically violent towards other people in any way, but im introverted and think i'm rude). i'm so fragile and stupid. that is not a good mix. i wish i could be euthanized. i am a cancer on society.
 
LastDay

LastDay

Soon, my dear big sister
Dec 29, 2018
104
652
I used to use a serrated knife. Oh wait a minute, you mean to ctb, not to cut. Hmm. Exacto knives are really sharp, I wonder how that would work. Also, you could bleed in the bathtub filled with water?
Hm, serrated, like can you give a pic/link example? I used to cut and thinking about it to CTB. Or at least see what it's like to give myself a deep cut.
 
  • Like
Reactions: sif and therhydler
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
Finally - a thread that's right up my alley!

Ah, the wonders of cutting. I too do it often, sometimes I feel like it's becoming an addiction haha. You mention that you want to commit suicide by cutting. I don't recommend that. This source: http://lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/statistics-most-lethal-methods shows that slitting your wrists has an incredibly low (6%) success rate, yet a very high (71) pain-rating. Find another method - we're happy to help you here.
yup everywhere discourages cutting to commit suicide. i wouldn't even take a chance if i had a gun... theres some really fucked up photos of failed gunshot suicides.

i just want to die, have my organs donated to an actual human being, be cremated, and that's it. why my healthcare providers won't satisfy that is beyond me. i am a piece of shit, trust me. a really stubborn one too. if i know myself, i should have a safe, accessible means to kill myself
 
21Neberg

21Neberg

Illuminated
Dec 17, 2018
1,559
7,737
yup everywhere discourages cutting to commit suicide. i wouldn't even take a chance if i had a gun... theres some really fucked up photos of failed gunshot suicides.

i just want to die, have my organs donated to an actual human being, be cremated, and that's it. why my healthcare providers won't satisfy that is beyond me. i am a piece of shit, trust me. a really stubborn one too. if i know myself, i should have a safe, accessible means to kill myself
I would take the chance with the gun. Of course, overcoming survival instinct in that situation is quite hard. But if I have done proper research and I’m sure I’m aiming the gun right, I’d take the chance.
 
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
I would take the chance with the gun. Of course, overcoming survival instinct in that situation is quite hard. But if I have done proper research and I’m sure I’m aiming the gun right, I’d take the chance.
if i knew 100% that it would work, and i could get a gun. i would do it. but neither of those things are cement.
 
  • Like
Reactions: sif and therhydler
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
yes, i'm on wellbutrin.

i drink on occasion and it's fine, but i dont know how it will mix with marijuana. there are some horror stories about seizures but if alcohol isn't causing them, marijuana shouldn't.

i have a vapourizer i bought two months ago and i bought some weed online last night, as it's readily available and legal where i am. i should get it in a couple of days but im going to wait until friday night/saturday morning to ingest it
I’m on Wellbutrin too, actually. I’ve never heard of any seizures with the combo, but I did recently look over Wellbutrin’s side effects/warnings, and there was a seizure risk if doses weren’t taken properly or in the right amount, so maybe that’s what you’ve heard about? I wouldn’t worry about that, it’s a pretty commonly prescribed drug and I never hear any wild stories about it.

I’m kind of wary of buying stuff like that online, but hopefully that’ll come through for you, & you can just chill out a bit. I have a vaporizer, too. So much better, right?! Then you can put on some chill shit on Netflix & try to relax.

I hope you’re doing ok. I should’ve read more of this thread first to catch up...
 
  • Like
Reactions: sif
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
I’m on Wellbutrin too, actually. I’ve never heard of any seizures with the combo, but I did recently look over Wellbutrin’s side effects/warnings, and there was a seizure risk if doses weren’t taken properly or in the right amount, so maybe that’s what you’ve heard about? I wouldn’t worry about that, it’s a pretty commonly prescribed drug and I never hear any wild stories about it.

I’m kind of wary of buying stuff like that online, but hopefully that’ll come through for you, & you can just chill out a bit. I have a vaporizer, too. So much better, right?! Then you can put on some chill shit on Netflix & try to relax.

I hope you’re doing ok. I should’ve read more of this thread first to catch up...
Haha my government sells it online :) I'm in canada
 
  • Like
Reactions: sif and TheCrow
W

Willdieby30

Member
Aug 21, 2018
45
99
Gatineau, Québec
Really?! Oh, shit. That is amazing. God, I wish we had Trudeau.
Well, my province, that is conservative, had to organize it (it's the provincial government's responsibility to run the online service, physical stores, etc.). Canadian politics in general are a bit more nuanced, but i get what you mean
 
  • Like
Reactions: TheCrow
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
Well, my province, that is conservative, had to organize it (it's the provincial government's responsibility to run the online service, physical stores, etc.). Canadian politics in general are a bit more nuanced, but i get what you mean
Right right. Same in the US with individual state laws, etc. But yeah, that’s a really convienent system!
 
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
the urge is strong today. want to curl up with vodka esspresso and hurt myself. anyway this thread didn't really solve anything but i appreciate getting to meet you!
Aww, I’m sorry. It’s nice to meet you, too. Try not to hurt yourself. Maybe drink just enough to feel tired and go to sleep.
 
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
54CDF2CB-B8EB-4429-B085-1201B0901EA8.jpeg
Hm, serrated, like can you give a pic/link example? I used to cut and thinking about it to CTB. Or at least see what it's like to give myself a deep cut.
It’s a knife with a jagged edge. At home it’s usually a bread or a steak knife. You cut with a saw-like motion and idk, it’s like it eases you into the cut, and then you can press harder and dig deeper with the rest of the knife. This is for cutting, not to ctb.
 
LastDay

LastDay

Soon, my dear big sister
Dec 29, 2018
104
652
View attachment 5573
It’s a knife with a jagged edge. At home it’s usually a bread or a steak knife. You cut with a saw-like motion and idk, it’s like it eases you into the cut, and then you can press harder and dig deeper with the rest of the knife. This is for cutting, not to ctb.
What would be for CTB just out of curiosity? Not that I would it's a horrible method.
 
TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
804
6,317
What would be for CTB just out of curiosity? Not that I would it's a horrible method.
You know, I really don’t know. Stuff with veins and arteries really freaks me out, so I haven’t put any real thought into this method. For real though, please don’t use it to ctb. When it doesn’t work, you’ll have those tell-tale suicide scars on your arms.
 
  • Like
Reactions: LastDay
kkatt

kkatt

Let's jump!! 146BPM
Nov 12, 2018
588
1,700
Hiding under the stairs
View attachment 5573
It’s a knife with a jagged edge. At home it’s usually a bread or a steak knife. You cut with a saw-like motion and idk, it’s like it eases you into the cut, and then you can press harder and dig deeper with the rest of the knife. This is for cutting, not to ctb.
I do agree that a Bread knife is a good choice. But the serrations on that one look to be too far apart. The closer serrations result in a much sharper implement. Mine is like this and it will cut through pretty much anything.
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 0, Guests: 1)

Thread starter Similar threads Forum Replies Date
M Suicide Discussion 3
lovemelovemenot Suicide Discussion 4
First loss Suicide Discussion 5