so many guests...

  • Welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, a pro-choice forum for the discussion of mental illness, suicide, and the moral implications of the act itself. This is not a pro-suicide site. We do not encourage or aid suicide, and the information offered is for educational purposes only. Read our rules and FAQ for more information. We also offer a recovery subforum if you wish to get support.

    You can close this box by clicking the top right "X".

lovemelovemenot

lovemelovemenot

what's the use...?
Jun 22, 2019
67
246
Well with the recent news bringing a lot of attention to the site it's not surprising. I do wonder how many are just regular lurkers, or people morbidly curious as to what goes down on the site. I know I lurked for a good month or so before finally joining.
 
Broken Chimera

Broken Chimera

Waiting For The End
May 27, 2019
512
700
Every time we have a publicized suicide or a goodbye thread the numbers spike. Sometimes I feel like we're not just being watched but studied. But usually we get a influx of new members right after. Idk if that's a good or bad thing.
 
Sensei

Sensei

Illuminated
Nov 4, 2019
1,090
2,099
In addition, I think there are many people who find solace in reading threads about suicide and recovery here, but choose to die by their own hand without ever joining and without any witnesses.

I can fully understand why the suicide and recovery subforums are open for everyone to read, because that may obviously help many people, but maybe there should be subforums for venting/support and off-topic stuff respectively which are for members only.
 
faust

faust

lost among the stars
Jan 26, 2020
682
788
Yes, I am noticing that constantly. And guests 2-3 times more than members. If there are extremely suicidal people among guests, they might be loosing a chance to get support there. No matter what happens to us, we need some kind-hearted people and a few good words. Many people cannot still believe that a taboo-subject can be discussed and there is no need to pretend that everything is alright. Would gladly see some more new people in recovery section or telling their story. :heart:
 
Underscore

Underscore

Illuminated
Jul 31, 2018
1,495
2,900
In addition, I think there are many people who find solace in reading threads about suicide and recovery here, but choose to die by their own hand without ever joining and without any witnesses.

I can fully understand why the suicide and recovery subforums are open for everyone to read, because that may obviously help many people, but maybe there should be subforums for venting/support and off-topic stuff respectively which are for members only.
I confess, I wondered if the suicide sub should be separated off and closed to non members and to new members until they've gone through a trial period. This would especially apply to the partners thread too. But I don't know. That would have the effect of almost 'proofing' people, not just if they are genuine but also if their intent is solid - give them support for a period before hand to make sure they understand the implications of accessing certain material, to try and prevent impulsive behaviour. On the other hand that could stop people in dangerous circumstances accessing the support they need. There are advantages and disadvantages and (as usual, sorry) I'm not entirely certain how I feel about the idea. And ofc there is the argument that people have the right to do whatever they please and its no-one's prerogative to censor that.:notsure:
 
Quarky00

Quarky00

Ascended
Dec 17, 2019
827
1,711
In addition, I think there are many people who find solace in reading threads about suicide and recovery here, but choose to die by their own hand without ever joining and without any witnesses.
I was just like that -- I was about to ctb , my research was complete , I've been lurking (guest) for few good months . I registered just to say thank you lol .
 
L

L-L

The Longest Lurker
Nov 14, 2019
57
149
Some interesting ideas on this thread.

I can attest to what I imagine are a few of the guests, though. I did genuinely lurk for a very long time - at least 8 months or so before joining. There may be a fair few who are like me amongst those guests.
 
Quarky00

Quarky00

Ascended
Dec 17, 2019
827
1,711
I confess, I wondered if the suicide sub should be separated off and closed to non members and to new members until they've gone through a trial period.
Someone suggested "Methods" sub-forum , so that suicide discussion will be separated from technical information . It's a good idea also to prevent pollution of suicide threads by new members asking not-so-smart questions . It kinda does not work , like they go hand in hand ?
And yeah much support comes from the main suicide forum . A trial period could make little difference -- a new member would just wait a week . But these ideas are good start that could/should be improved .
~

However , this kinds of thread should be closed for public and new members (I don't know how) :



etc
 
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faust

faust

lost among the stars
Jan 26, 2020
682
788
Someone suggested "Methods" sub-forum , so that suicide discussion will be separated from technical information . It's a good idea also to prevent pollution of suicide threads by new members asking not-so-smart questions . It kinda does not work , like they go hand in hand ?
And yeah much support comes from the main suicide forum . A trial period could make little difference -- a new member would just wait a week . But these ideas are good start that could/should be improved .
~

However , this kinds of thread should be closed for public and new members (I don't know how) :



etc
Unfortunately, if methods are closed for lurkers and new members, PePH will be still easy to find. Also, there are lots of other websites where such an information is in abundance. We are trying to make methods as safe and peaceful as possible, some websites do not care about that and eventually such reads may just ruin somebody's life. So it is just a flip-side of a coin.
Edit: even Wikipedia teaches us to CTB
Someone suggested "Methods" sub-forum , so that suicide discussion will be separated from technical information . It's a good idea also to prevent pollution of suicide threads by new members asking not-so-smart questions . It kinda does not work , like they go hand in hand ?
And yeah much support comes from the main suicide forum . A trial period could make little difference -- a new member would just wait a week . But these ideas are good start that could/should be improved .
~

However , this kinds of thread should be closed for public and new members (I don't know how) :



etc
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_by_hanging Like this
 
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Quarky00

Quarky00

Ascended
Dec 17, 2019
827
1,711
Unfortunately, if methods are closed for lurkers and new members, PePH will be still easy to find. Also, there are lots of other websites where such an information is in abundance. We are trying to make methods as safe and peaceful as possible, some websites do not care about that and eventually such reads may just ruin somebody's life. So it is just a flip-side of a coin.
Edit: even Wikipedia teaches us to CTB

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_by_hanging Like this
Very good points . The original idea was not about hiding methods but making order in threads . I guess because we can't separate ctb from ctb methods , and we want to make methods discussion public (thus smarter and safer) , it's not really practical .

Perhaps a better approach , instead of Samaritans notice that was removed there should be short introduction (pro choice) , basic rules (no encouragement suppliers ) , redirection to recovery forum , and link emphasizing resource page .

I think "Where can I get X" could be a pinned post (like partners megathread) . It's really annoying . It's polluting . It's bad for brand . It's bad for suppliers .

Sorry this has turned into a technical post (feedback forum) and I've digressed from original subject (blame Underscode!;) -- new guests and members are coming , how we feel about it .
 
faust

faust

lost among the stars
Jan 26, 2020
682
788
Very good points . The original idea was not about hiding methods but making order in threads . I guess because we can't separate ctb from ctb methods , and we want to make methods discussion public (thus smarter and safer) , it's not really practical .

Perhaps a better approach , instead of Samaritans notice that was removed there should be short introduction (pro choice) , basic rules (no encouragement suppliers ) , redirection to recovery forum , and link emphasizing resource page .

I think "Where can I get X" could be a pinned post (like partners megathread) . It's really annoying . It's polluting . It's bad for brand . It's bad for suppliers .

Sorry this has turned into a technical post (feedback forum) and I've digressed from original subject (blame Underscode!;) -- new guests and members are coming , how we feel about it .
I think Samaritans can help if people are impulsive, but if you just google SS, you will get Helpline first. So I think it could be a separate thread created with numbers in case of emergency. Samaritans are not working good for us, long-years suicidal people, but despite negative reports can be good for a certain group of people.
I have mixed feelings about lots of guests. Because all the people are different. And the reason why they are here are different appropriately.
They know I am here, they heard how bad my cooking is, can’t believe it, and want to see for themselves :blarg:
You may stop a suicide by gifting your cooking! It is never good to CTB on full stomach!
 
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A

arposandra

Member
Nov 16, 2019
14
35
I think most people lurked before joining so some of them will be genuine. But yeah, some will be LEOs or media or whatever.

Scary thing is some of them might be both.
I've lurked here and the previous sub iterations and migrations for years, and even still I lurk more than interact.
Most of the time I'll type out my thoughts, hit delete, then just complete discard my thoughts and instead end up liking a bunch of other members' posts while lurking.
It's just often a back and forth of being at a loss for words or being overwhelmed with words and not wanting to bother others with word salad.
 
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thrw_a_way1221221

thrw_a_way1221221

Angel of Choice - time is getting closer...
Aug 30, 2018
3,687
12,258
Every time we have a publicized suicide or a goodbye thread the numbers spike. Sometimes I feel like we're not just being watched but studied. But usually we get a influx of new members right after. Idk if that's a good or bad thing.
It depends. If the majority of the influx of new members are pro-lifers or proselytizers then it could cause disruption and uneasiness in a forum already full of vulnerable people, which is bad. However, if it brings new SS members that are pro-choice and respect each others' views and what not, then it would be good.
 
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Underscore

Underscore

Illuminated
Jul 31, 2018
1,495
2,900
Someone suggested "Methods" sub-forum , so that suicide discussion will be separated from technical information . It's a good idea also to prevent pollution of suicide threads by new members asking not-so-smart questions . It kinda does not work , like they go hand in hand ?
And yeah much support comes from the main suicide forum . A trial period could make little difference -- a member would just wait a week . But these ideas are good start that could/should be improved .
yeah like I say there's no easy answer here
I've lurked here and the previous sub iterations and migrations for years, and even still I lurk more than interact.
Most of the time I'll type out my thoughts, hit delete, then just complete discard my thoughts and instead end up liking a bunch of other members' posts while lurking.
It's just often a back and forth of being at a loss for words or being overwhelmed with words and not wanting to bother others with word salad.
Noooo word salad is fine, it's great, i suffer from that all the time! I know what you mean, I do the 'type it out then delete it all' too. Then I post anyway.
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

NaN0² Priest
Oct 30, 2019
2,438
4,987
The guests are the smart ones if anything. There's more then enough information that can be gleaned without signing up.

Becoming a member just exposes you to more risk really. I would've stayed a guest but I'm way past the point of caring anymore.
 
Jessamine

Jessamine

Veteran
Oct 28, 2019
180
112
The guests are the smart ones if anything. There's more then enough information that can be gleaned without signing up.

Becoming a member just exposes you to more risk really. I would've stayed a guest but I'm way past the point of caring anymore.
Guests who stay as guests do miss out on the connections you make with real people who feel the same way you do though, and that’s such a valuable thing about this place.
 
Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

NaN0² Priest
Oct 30, 2019
2,438
4,987
Guests who stay as guests do miss out on the connections you make with real people who feel the same way you do though, and that’s such a valuable thing about this place.
That's of course very true. But as mentioned above if they're just gathering information on methods it's not necessary to sign up. The information is widespread across the net.

Signing up is also crucial if you're here for the recovery aspect. This place is many things to many people.
 
Broken Chimera

Broken Chimera

Waiting For The End
May 27, 2019
512
700
It depends. If the majority of the influx of new members are pro-lifers or proselytizers then it could cause disruption and uneasiness in a forum already full of vulnerable people, which is bad. However, if it brings new SS members that are pro-choice and respect each others' views and what not, then it would be good.
That's the thing, they don't have to join to disrupt anything. The LEO's (@Underscore I like that term and I'm using it) put out their message almost anywhere while we only have this place to come for support. People who come to stir up trouble won't last long.
 
Finding_Peace

Finding_Peace

Member
Feb 13, 2020
11
12
Some interesting ideas on this thread.

I can attest to what I imagine are a few of the guests, though. I did genuinely lurk for a very long time - at least 8 months or so before joining. There may be a fair few who are like me amongst those guests.
I did the same, but admittedly not for so long. I found this forum after a failed, four-day suicide attempt at the end of 2019 into 2020 and realised things didn’t need to be as painful as I had made them over the course of the last 10 years. I made an account recently so I could search and find more information directly related to my method before I tried it, but if I hadn’t needed to I probably would’ve stayed a guest up to my ctb date tbh.
 
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Epsilon0

Epsilon0

One candle left to burn before the darkness comes.
Dec 28, 2019
352
691
I was a guest for more than half a year before joining. I was amazed at how openly people in this forum shared the hardships they were going through. Their stories gave me strength but also a longing to be a part of this community.

I don’t regret one bit having signed up for an account. And I am convinced I never would have done it, had I not been a lurker first. So, I think it’s important that this forum continues to stay visible for non-members.

That being said, I believe anonymity is crucial. We should all be careful with what we post and how much we reveal, because we never know who is reading.

As far as I’m concerned, as long as I feel noone can trace me and find out personal information such as my name and home address, I don’t have a problem with lurkers.

Here’s a shout out to all the guests out there! I am sorry you are here.
 
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