On a scale of 0-10, rate your suicidal thoughts today

TheLostCause

TheLostCause

Falling Apart
Joined
Nov 7, 2020
Messages
74
7-8 which has been a daily thing for a couple years. Days when it gets to a 10 is when im really desperate and will act on something even if im not sure it will succeed.
 
A

AutoTap

Arcanist
Joined
Nov 11, 2020
Messages
528
It bounces up and down by the hour. Never less then a 5 though. Right now I’d say a 7 and two hours ago an 8.5
 
BehindTheWall

BehindTheWall

Grand voyage.
Joined
Aug 26, 2020
Messages
34
3. I’ve been ok last weeks, but here we go again.
 
Echo

Echo

Not waving but drowning-
Joined
Oct 28, 2020
Messages
211
I just spent an hour trying to find sn or anything that i could be sure would get to me here. I even researched something i hadn’t heard of- just because it was there and apparently available. But probably not a peaceful ctb with it so... but i’m not sure i even care anymore about peaceful.
My sn may be stuck at the border... so how do i rate this? A desperate 7/8 or a more passive 8/9?
 
ccalderonpv

ccalderonpv

We are nothingness
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
32
8. I’ve come to realize with my current relationship that I haven’t changed, that the past still haunts me and that I’m worthless. Than in the end I’ll always be alone and that I always scare those I love away and they’ll always leave me...
 
All washed up

All washed up

Wise
Joined
Oct 31, 2020
Messages
222
6
Always on my mind.
Not just yet but constant regret and lack of anything to look forward to are constants in my life
 
sadworld

sadworld

existence is a nightmare
Joined
Aug 25, 2020
Messages
2,152
7. I don't know how my future looks like and it increases my suicidal thoughts.
 
SterileMoth

SterileMoth

Just a sleep deprived trashcan
Joined
Jul 9, 2020
Messages
68
5 or 6. My friend came over. We drank, I smoked weed, and we did some indoor skiing. The day really wasn't that bad ... It was pretty okay actually. But I wouldn't mind being apart from it all. I'm still drinking, I took an Ativan but I'm still up and still drinking. I can't stop clenching my jaw. I'm tempted to sneak another from my friend ... I have my own, but she has more, not even prescribed, and I can't stop clenching my jaw. I'm chewing on my tongue as we speak. It was a dumb decision. But it was one I made. So we'll live with it. I'm not at the point where my friends don't matter to me, I still care, I still want them to be okay. I don't want to put them through that (again, for most of them) I don't want the ones they care so so much about to disappear again.
I don't really want to get here ... I really really don't, but people care, my absence would mess with them, and I'd rather make sure their okay than make sure I am. Another example of how I care for others more than myself, in the end. No less true than it was before.
 
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Joined
Sep 4, 2019
Messages
4,500
Currently a 4. Not too bad, but could be better
 
Xocoyotziin

Xocoyotziin

Scorpion
Joined
Sep 5, 2020
Messages
421
I'm approaching daf (drunk as fuck) so like 1 for the next however many hours
Tomorrow morning is going to be death ofc but I have wine for that too
 
WhatIsMyPurpose

WhatIsMyPurpose

I serve butter. That's it.
Joined
Nov 19, 2020
Messages
4
I'd say like a 3 or a 4 right now, luckily. I notice that if I don't think about it (i.e. focused at work or playing a video game or something), it goes away, but once I start thinking about it again, it snowballs into a high number pretty fast. The roller coaster of this number's value in my head is not fun.
 
S

Spitfire

Arcanist
Joined
Apr 26, 2020
Messages
595
9.95 at the moment. Chances of doing it are at a 0.01% at the same time for right now though.
 
W

whywere

Arcanist
Joined
Jun 26, 2020
Messages
533
today about a 3. i have freinds on here now, that helps, and chronic pain is not too bad right now. Thank you opoids for that!
 
BridgeJumper1994

BridgeJumper1994

The Arsonist
Joined
Apr 7, 2019
Messages
1,054
Im at the point where I hallucinate myself jumping and screaming 'NOO!' while sirens go off in the backround...
10-12?
today about a 3. i have freinds on here now, that helps, and chronic pain is not too bad right now. Thank you opoids for that!
How can you just take them and not be hooked,this is the biggest mistake of my entire life...
 
Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Joined
Sep 4, 2019
Messages
4,500
3.5 for me. Not too bad
 
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