On a scale of 0-10, rate your suicidal thoughts today

Symbiote

Symbiote

Sh*t.Happens
Joined
Oct 12, 2020
Messages
715
10. Thanks for letting me know how much you hate me and that you're better off without me. I know that's not your upcoming period talking, nah it's the real truth. 3 years of marriage and you feel like I'm useless, a head case, and a bottom feeder. Gee, why did you marry a useless, headcase bottom feeder in the first place? BTW, the I gave you a car and a house, you didn't earn those yourself. /vent
 
WaitForSleep

WaitForSleep

Member
Joined
Nov 23, 2019
Messages
7
9. I'm so tired of it all, I just don't want to do it anymore. It's gone on too long and it won't end. I'm so tired of trying to convince myself of a reason to stay; there's only one way out to escape this shithole. I have no reason to keep going, and those three people out there who would be affected by me dying would forget about it soon enough.
 
Xocoyotziin

Xocoyotziin

Scorpion
Joined
Sep 5, 2020
Messages
421
I was at a 9 earlier today but like a good 9, my feelings weren't driven by impulse or pain this time.
Very close but it still wasn't right enough.
Last night I went out searching for a spot. I think it would actually be pretty easy.
But for now I'm resting at a baseline 4.
 
sinbound haibane

sinbound haibane

Member
Joined
Oct 1, 2020
Messages
14
9. I'm working on it. I can't really work on much else. It's hard to force myself to work, to eat, to anything just about. It makes me worry about what will happen if I don't CTB soon. But it will still be at least a few weeks until I have the supplies, if not longer. Caught between working on work which has a deadline coming up and my final gift for my friend and the overwhelming need to just lie down and be nothing.
 
Jumper Geo

Jumper Geo

Life's a bitch and then you die.
Joined
Feb 23, 2020
Messages
2,215
With Christmas so close and I have bought all my presents and had them delivered in lockdown I think I will hang around for the silly season, I suppose atm it's about 6/10 but who knows I have stocked up on stella lager so i'm not going anywhere until I have drunk it, lol.

Cheers

Geo
 
Forgotten Cadence

Forgotten Cadence

There's A Void In My Heart
Joined
Nov 4, 2020
Messages
87
10.

Home has been more toxic than a sea of radioactive waste lately. It's clear I'm unwanted, but rent is too expensive to live alone, so I'm feeling trapped. I have an old bottle of SN that's looking pretty tempting right now.
 
HelloHell

HelloHell

Wise
Joined
Dec 26, 2019
Messages
271
I would say 9 for today
I really want to die like really want it but i can't help to feel bad for my counsellor and psych. they're both really great but it doesn't change my desire to die. this sucks i hate it
 
Xocoyotziin

Xocoyotziin

Scorpion
Joined
Sep 5, 2020
Messages
421
10 :happy:
I think everything will be okay. And if it's not, whatever. I'll fuck that nightmare up the same way I did this one.
No date
But I feel solid about it

Watch me live another ten years LMAO
And then have to apologize for my melodrama lol
Yeah no. I'm tired of it.
 
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Railiah P

Railiah P

Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2020
Messages
14
5 I slept all day yesterday and half the day today. I’m trying to dull the feeling. 5 is good for me.
 
Lovequenel

Lovequenel

Arcanist
Joined
Sep 21, 2020
Messages
564
6
not sure how the future will improve and i wasn't able to figure out how to make my gf feel better when she called about a bad day at work. she's basically the only justification i have to stay alive but i wonder if the most ethical thing to do would be to kill myself and thereby free her up.
 
darksideofthebright

darksideofthebright

Check in on your happy friend
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
173
I would say 5. :notsure:

It is a bit annoying for me because I have been on the fence for a bit of time now; and I'm just torn between staying in this world for others and leaving this world for my own good.
 
S

Spitfire

Arcanist
Joined
Apr 26, 2020
Messages
595
6.5 at the moment.

It seems I am back to maintaining this feeling at a 6-7 as a normally expected daily baseline level anymore lately.
 
M

Meadow12

New Member
Joined
Nov 8, 2020
Messages
4
10... I want this to be over.. i just dont know how.
 
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