My husband thinks I should be hospitalized

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Soulless_Angel

Soulless_Angel

self destruct activated
Jul 10, 2019
1,131
2,034
if you need hospital to keep you safe, then right now you are not ready to take your own life, you sound like you are crying out for help, but its being refused at every angle, its these situations the mental health services frustrate me, they refuse to help those in crisis, those clearly wanting help!
I don't understand the system at this point.

Get in touch with anyone you can to get you the help you need, don't stop banging those doors,
 
UpandDownPrincess

UpandDownPrincess

Wise
Dec 31, 2019
270
479
I haven't told him about my latest attempt but I sent some worrying messages.
He's very worried and I feel very guilty.
He has sent back a message saying that he only has my best interests at heart and he thinks I should go to the hospital.
He says something needs to change.
I agree, but I don't think I'm considered severe enough for hospitalization.
I have tried getting help and was told I wasn't in the right mindset but I still see a psychologist.
I saw her a couple weeks ago and told her about my attempt. She knows I've tried twice in the last few months.
The real number I've tried is 7, at least.
He reaction was to get me to see a mental health nurse.
I don't know what is best for me.
I'm desperate.
I keep breaking down, I keep spamming here, I keep getting mood swings, I keep doing everything wrong and getting so stressed.
I'm so fucked.
My last hospital visit was actually helpful. Because I didn't have to micromanage every thought, every minute and every idea. Once I knew I wouldn't have access to my method, I was able to relax a bit and get some sleep. And that was priceless.

Yes, they did wake me up a few times with the damn flashlight and the staff there was far from perfect. But I got some rest, which was overdue, I was fed three times a day - something that hadn't happened in a long time, and I did a lot of coloring, which was almost fun.

It hasn't always been that way and every hospital is different, but you might find that it is restful, and that can be a good thing.

You can always start by telling them just a bit of what's going on, then you may want to add more or backtrack depending on your experience.

Hugs to you.
Cool beans . And what does he say about jobs/bills ? :wink:

(Sorry for barging in like that , I was really frustrated by your situation and did not know what to say .. until this popped in)
Quarky00-

I love that you said "cool beans." I thought I was the only one who said that!
 
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peacefighter

Member
Jan 7, 2020
15
17
if you need hospital to keep you safe, then right now you are not ready to take your own life, you sound like you are crying out for help, but its being refused at every angle, its these situations the mental health services frustrate me, they refuse to help those in crisis, those clearly wanting help!
I don't understand the system at this point.

Get in touch with anyone you can to get you the help you need, don't stop banging those doors,

Interesting. My sister thinks I should go to hospital but I won't because I want to go so much, and yet I suffer so much with not going for it. Talk about being between a rock and a very hard place.
Sorry not to be of any help, but I think there is some truth in what has been said here. Perhaps help through this patch is the answer, then see how you feel. Ha, maybe I should take my own advice!
 
Quarky00

Quarky00

Illuminated
Dec 17, 2019
1,016
2,061
I have a feeling he's going to bring up tonight so hopefully I'll talk to him then about it.
He's very special to me.
In an ideal world, I think it would.
I think you should be open and raise fears calmly . I know you have strong suicidal intentions and wishes , and you act upon those . It's okay . You wannt ctb . But it sounds like you are very aware of things , and yes , very responsible and caring -- just in need of some answers and reassurance . It sounds like you feel very safe with him , so I guess put your trust in him , feel free and safe to express yourself , and hear him out? Devise solutions together . It sounds like you view hospital as perhaps beneficial but worried about practical and emotional things around that process (rightly so!) . Maybe he'd make you feel calm about certain things.

I understand there's a lot of anxiety involved . You worry about him . He's worried about you . It shows you care -- you've expressed that yourself -- so try and make this 'system' (you two) work together :heart:

I'm sorry this comment turned into a cliche about love and "talking" .... I honestly don't know what's good for you ... I was just trying to unpack everything you mentioned :hug:
 
C

ClonesAnnoyMe

-
Feb 7, 2020
134
108
Interesting. My sister thinks I should go to hospital but I won't because I want to go so much, and yet I suffer so much with not going for it. Talk about being between a rock and a very hard place.
Sorry not to be of any help, but I think there is some truth in what has been said here. Perhaps help through this patch is the answer, then see how you feel. Ha, maybe I should take my own advice!
If you are close to ctbing then I definately think the hospital is the right choice. It could give you a fresh perspective on things or just give you time to rest
 
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ParasiteEOT

New Member
Feb 12, 2020
3
1
I think I will be too worried about money this time and how my husband is doing.
And I'll be away from him which won't do me any good
Apologies in advance as I'm new here. Just wondered whether both you and your husband currently work, or is it just your husband?
 
SHThrowAway213

SHThrowAway213

Help
Apr 19, 2018
314
590
Apologies in advance as I'm new here. Just wondered whether both you and your husband currently work, or is it just your husband?
He works full time, I work part time at the moment. Not by choice, zero hour contract.
 
L

Lucifer'sRight

Member
Feb 4, 2020
17
33
I totally get the guilt part. I think that the simplest methods are sometimes the best. Its way easier to go through something if you put it down on paper, it gets rid of the mental chaos. Maybe you should outline all the reasons for and against, and what you think would be the outcome of either decision. Or you can try free association when you just write everything that comes into your mind, uncensored. At least you'll see what is already clear to you and what needs to be uncovered.
 
Quarky00

Quarky00

Illuminated
Dec 17, 2019
1,016
2,061
Did you discuss possible monetary solutions, and how you'd cope without him (ie visits chat calls)? :heart:
 
Xena87

Xena87

Queen of the night
Dec 9, 2019
105
131
Seeing beachy head I assume you live in the UK? Good luck with getting help here! This country is notorious for having atrocious mental health services, BELIEVE ME! I have been in the system for years and am still not being helped. I'm so sorry, It seems you are crying out for help which is why you've created this forum and I hope you get it. All I can suggest is keep pestering your drs for help, see numerous Dr's for various opinions and ask your husband to go with you to these appointments.
Also, PRAY! I understand how it feels to be completely alone in this world with pain for company but God truly loves you. We all love you!
 
SHThrowAway213

SHThrowAway213

Help
Apr 19, 2018
314
590
Did you discuss possible monetary solutions, and how you'd cope without him (ie visits chat calls)? :heart:
To be honest I don't think I'll cope that well without him
On the days off you do have, could you make use of the Wellbeing Centres?
Yes I could
Seeing beachy head I assume you live in the UK? Good luck with getting help here! This country is notorious for having atrocious mental health services, BELIEVE ME! I have been in the system for years and am still not being helped. I'm so sorry, It seems you are crying out for help which is why you've created this forum and I hope you get it. All I can suggest is keep pestering your drs for help, see numerous Dr's for various opinions and ask your husband to go with you to these appointments.
Also, PRAY! I understand how it feels to be completely alone in this world with pain for company but God truly loves you. We all love you!
UK.
It has been terrible trying to get the help l need
Thank you
 
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Quarky00

Quarky00

Illuminated
Dec 17, 2019
1,016
2,061
There's no way he can keep in touch every few hours and/or visit daily? (I know it's a bit far fetched for working people).

Or use us when he's not available? Either PM people you know, or open a thread and please do "pollute" us on an hourly level :heart:

(I'm just brainstorming not telling what to do. It's really tough situation.)
 
SHThrowAway213

SHThrowAway213

Help
Apr 19, 2018
314
590
There's no way he can keep in touch every few hours and/or visit daily? (I know it's a bit far fetched for working people).

Or use us when he's not available? Either PM people you know, or open a thread and please do "pollute" us on an hourly level :heart:

(I'm just brainstorming not telling what to do. It's really tough situation.)
If I was allowed my phone we could message each other, and he would but he works 60 hours and we have a dog.
I don't really know /talk to anyone from here.
Thanks for the ideas
 
Quarky00

Quarky00

Illuminated
Dec 17, 2019
1,016
2,061
If I was allowed my phone we could message each other, and he would but he works 60 hours and we have a dog.
I don't really know /talk to anyone from here.
Thanks for the ideas
You can have your phone.

That would be great for you.

Check with hospital procedures. You can call them, or ask NGOs in you area that deal with mental issues (that's what I did).

Open units are psychiatric units that are not as secure as crisis stabilization units. They are not used for acutely suicidal persons; instead, the focus in these units is to make life as normal as possible for patients while continuing treatment
You and your husband need to stand on your rights and make it clear to psychiatrists you need an open ward. You may do so by telling contact with husband is critical ; saying you have suicidal ideation but do not plan on killing yourself soon ; if you are not violent or in psychosis or delusional you should be in the open ward. These wards allow vacation at home.

Please check hospitalization terms and find those that suits you. Either way (home or hospital) you should make an informed decision :heart: