Funeral arrangments

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M

MAIO

Enlightened
Apr 8, 2018
802
2,402
Should I take care of funeral arrangements myself or leave that for the living? I would prefer to not have a funeral, be cremated and not tell any family members etc(I wish instead I could just push a never born button) However I know funerals for the living not the dead, So maybe I should just let them have their dramatic moments however they see fit, What do you guys think? I am also not sure if I should leave a suicide note. Is it better for them to think I was just overwhelmed by emotions/ depression just got the best of me or this was really well thought out for a very long time and I see things clearly? I am not sure.
 
Sonnenblume

Sonnenblume

Sunflower Panda
Apr 6, 2018
588
1,759
Should I take care of funeral arrangements myself or leave that for the living? I would prefer to not have a funeral, be cremated and not tell any family members etc(I wish instead I could just push a never born button) However I know funerals for the living not the dead, So maybe I should just let them have their dramatic moments however they see fit, What do you guys think? I am also not sure if I should leave a suicide note. Is it better for them to think I was just overwhelmed by emotions/ depression just got the best of me or this was really well thought out for a very long time and I see things clearly? I am not sure.
If you don't want a funeral you should mention that in your note. However, if what you think your family would want is important to you, I'd let them do as they want after you're gone. I would at least leave a note stating it's a suicide and a line about why... health, or depression, or finances, etc... you don't have to go into detail.
 
M

MAIO

Enlightened
Apr 8, 2018
802
2,402
If you don't want a funeral you should mention that in your note. However, if what you think your family would want is important to you, I'd let them do as they want after you're gone. I would at least leave a note stating it's a suicide and a line about why... health, or depression, or finances, etc... you don't have to go into detail.
It's really just because I do not think my life is worth living and I know it's very likely if i do not kill myself I am going to end up regretting it, as I always have. It's hard to explain that kind of thing to people.
 
Sonnenblume

Sonnenblume

Sunflower Panda
Apr 6, 2018
588
1,759
It's really just because I do not think my life is worth living and I know it's very likely if i do not kill myself I am going to end up regretting it, as I always have. It's hard to explain that kind of thing to people.
Just say that then, or whatever you feel like. You don't owe anyone an explanation, really. You just want to make it clear to police that you took your own life of your own choice.
 
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El Topo

El Topo

(---)
Apr 21, 2018
480
1,248
Should I take care of funeral arrangements myself or leave that for the living? I would prefer to not have a funeral, be cremated and not tell any family members etc(I wish instead I could just push a never born button) However I know funerals for the living not the dead, So maybe I should just let them have their dramatic moments however they see fit, What do you guys think? I am also not sure if I should leave a suicide note. Is it better for them to think I was just overwhelmed by emotions/ depression just got the best of me or this was really well thought out for a very long time and I see things clearly? I am not sure.
Once you're dead, your family members are not legally required to follow your wishes, unless you go through the process of getting a lawyer, a notarized living will, etc. My parents are Christian and will want a traditional Christian funeral, which I'd rather not have, but as you said, "funerals are for the living." In my note, I'm going to say, "I would like my body to be cremated and ashes spread in the ocean, but feel free to hold any kind of funeral you wish."

I think it's best to leave a note if there are any people who care about you. It will not lessen their grief, but it will at least help them understand why you did it. I mean, they won't really understand, but I think over time, it will help if they know that your decision was "rational" and not just a spur-of-the-moment thing.

Another member posted this guide about writing suicide notes:
https://archive.ashspace.org/ashbusstop.org/Note.html
 
M

mwu14

Member
Apr 21, 2018
53
160
"I think it's best to leave a note if there are any people who care about you. It will not lessen their grief, but it will at least help them understand why you did it. I mean, they won't really understand, but I think over time, it will help if they know that your decision was "rational" and not just a spur-of-the-moment thing."

I agree with this.
 
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M

millefeui

-
Mar 31, 2018
1,037
5,298
Let the people who stay behind do as they wish. A funeral is a tradition for the living, not for the dead. Personally, I don't want a funeral, but I will be dead, hopefully not in some afterlife bullshit, but gone forever. It doesn't really matter to me whether they perform a funeral or not. If it helps them cope with my death, then I encourage them to perform a funeral ceremony. Or two. Or three. How many they deem necessary.

As for a suicide note, here is my take on the matter: Are you going to blame someone for your death/for wanting to die in the note? If so, don't bother. Don't ruin someone's life, the blame will eat them alive. If your plan is to explain why you want to die and relief your family from guilty, then please do leave a note.
 
J

Journeytoletgo

Member
May 14, 2018
89
142
I will leave enough funds for cremation for myself to my parents. Thats if I can stay alive long enough to save up for it. However, everything else will be paid off
 
ImNotBatman

ImNotBatman

Veteran
May 9, 2018
144
353
It doesnt matter how your body ends up after you are dead. Your life has ended, conciousness has stopped and your soul with it. You don't need to care about your body. Be happy you will find peace, and screw the rest.

As far as a note, mine will be either comedic, or damning towards individuals I disliked but will inevitably show up at the funeral. My greatest wish is that they have issues sleeping forever...but I digress. Whatever your note says, make sure it means what you want it to. Type it up. Ive seen one too many stories about "shit"ily written. Link, oh and its got some humor to lighten the day.
http://www.cracked.com/article_15658_the-ten-minute-suicide-guide.html