"So if you love me let me go" -snuff
- Jul 1, 2020
youre trapped inside yourself. you can see the outside world but you cant reach it, just watch. you have no control over your thoughts, your feelings, your actions, your words. even what you see is blurred and distorted. everything is wrong. it has a sense of surrealism. you cant tell time anymore. that joint you had just a few minutes before feels like hours away. you forget to do basic things like eating. youre just so.....inside of yourself, all you can think of is your thoughts. the past, the present and the future. its constant, you never get a break from it all. even sleeping feels abnormal. and yet in the midst of this hell i feel calm. the purpose of dissociation is to protect you from yourself. so while on the outside everything is wrong, it couldnt be more peaceful inside, creating this hectic calm. although it may sound in a way.....peaceful and welcoming. its really a hell i want to end. id give anything to feel normal again.