Ctb or catch the psych ward

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F

Fadingfast

Come in peace, go in peace
May 9, 2019
106
297
My dreams are even depressing... I can't even catch a break from my depressing existence in sleep. If I dont get the nerve to jump by next week Wednesday my family will have me commited to the psych ward again. I screwed up my only chance at a lasting relationship. I was in the psych ward for a couple months and when I came out my partner was married to someone else. I can not possibly continue this lonesome existence. All I do all day is tell myself to end it. The emotional pain has over taken. The schizophrenic part of my brain has merged with my bipolar and I can't take it anymore. Please, let me have the courage to jump. There's no other way for me.
 
R

Roberto

Wizard
Jan 19, 2019
663
1,555
Do you take medication? If it were me, I would go to the psych yard. Far enough from this world.
 
J

Jean Améry

Visionary
Mar 17, 2019
908
3,030
I'm sorry you're in so much misery. It seems your family is putting a lot of pressure on you. I can't tell you whether CTB would be preferable to life on a psych ward. I was on one for about 4 months in total for depression (on a voluntary basis): it taught me psychiatry is not based on science and if it helps it's mainly through social means. Of course I don't know what your experiences were.

The best of luck with whatever you decide.
 
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F

Fadingfast

Come in peace, go in peace
May 9, 2019
106
297
I've been medicated for years and nothing gets easier. If anything it's gotten worse. Of I go to the psych ward I'll come back the same. Im such a ftequent flyer that the staff has given me a nick name... They know me as Pussnboots :( so embarassing.
 
Halo13

Halo13

Wizard
May 9, 2019
672
2,942
My dreams are even depressing... I can't even catch a break from my depressing existence in sleep. If I dont get the nerve to jump by next week Wednesday my family will have me commited to the psych ward again. I screwed up my only chance at a lasting relationship. I was in the psych ward for a couple months and when I came out my partner was married to someone else. I can not possibly continue this lonesome existence. All I do all day is tell myself to end it. The emotional pain has over taken. The schizophrenic part of my brain has merged with my bipolar and I can't take it anymore. Please, let me have the courage to jump. There's no other way for me.
I hope I don't sound rude or offensive but you were in the psych ward for two months and your partner married someone else?? That doesn't sound like a person who is worth caring about. Someone who loves and truly cares doesn't just marry someone else in a few weeks. That is not unconditional love on their part and would not last as a relationship. A good relationship is not conditional. Sounds like you're much better off without them.

I'm sorry you're in so much pain but nobody deserves to be in a fair weather relationship. You deserve MUCH better than that, not settling for less! :hug:
 
M

Mogley26

Veteran
Apr 10, 2019
182
188
My dreams are even depressing... I can't even catch a break from my depressing existence in sleep. If I dont get the nerve to jump by next week Wednesday my family will have me commited to the psych ward again. I screwed up my only chance at a lasting relationship. I was in the psych ward for a couple months and when I came out my partner was married to someone else. I can not possibly continue this lonesome existence. All I do all day is tell myself to end it. The emotional pain has over taken. The schizophrenic part of my brain has merged with my bipolar and I can't take it anymore. Please, let me have the courage to jump. There's no other way for me.
Really? Jumping is the only way? Do you have a place to jump from?
 
F

Fadingfast

Come in peace, go in peace
May 9, 2019
106
297
Fuck it Im gonna drive to Niagara Falls. No high bridges here in Georgia.
Opps didn't mean to drop the f bomb just frustrated. The drives less than a day and I've seen it before.
 
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