Venting Crying uncontrollably after a call from work

Lotus

Lotus

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Hi. I'm a student at medical school and I'm currently working part time at a hospital unit. I've worked there since June (full time until September). I just got a phone call from the head of the unit. She told me that a nurse was complaining about my responsibilities at work. I know that she refers to my last shift this week, and I'm pretty sure who the nurse is (I've only worked with her this shift). I'm feeling so worthless and devastated. I had a pretty bad anxiety attack, and I've been crying since. I had to call the head of the unit back because I wasn't able to pull myself together during the first call, and had to call my mom before I got the courage to call back. I don't mind constructive criticism at all, but I feel like this is the typical thing that can happen in a female dominated work environment. No one has said anything to me directly to my face, even when I have asked if it's something that I should do or get better at, but then the boss is calling me and I feel like I can't defend myself. As a student I'm nothing, and I feel like she just took the nurse's word for it. I've only been getting posivite feedback so far since I started in June. She said that the complaint was about me asking the nurses that are responsible for the different patient if they need me to to anything (I usually don't have patients on my own, so I step in where I'm needed - in other words, I get excluded when they delegate patients and ignore me when I ask), and that I don't just do it without telling or asking them. I can't sit down during the shift, and I need to find work even if it's filling up random stuff that's already stocked up. This exact shift was a tough one for the nurses, I know that, and I got asked to do a lot I'm not allowed to do or haven't been taught to do. The last thing I want to do is cause a patient harm because I'm doing things I don't know, so I told the nurse that complained on me that I can do it if I get guidance, and she wasn't exactly happy about that. One of the doctors was really happy about showing me though. I feel like I was blamed for the busy shift and that I couldn't do all the nurse stuff.

Thanks for reading. I'm already feeling horrible about myself, and I feel like I'm at the verge of going down the ctb pathway again, and this doesn't make anything better. I've been working my ass off at the same time I'm back with my medical studies, and I feel like I'm not appreciated at all. She was just like: "So, uhm, do you feel comfortable working here further?" My mom told me that I should say yes, but I said that I want to be someone that contributes to the team and to the patients. So now I have to talk to her after I do my next shift (which I don't even know when is). I feel like crap, and I wonder if I deserve all this shit going on in my life. Am I that of an awful person?
 
Lilacmoon

Lilacmoon

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from the times we spoke, you certainly don't seem like an awful person. just someone suffering and in a lot of pain. your situation is very difficult, unfortunately. I don't have much advice there :(
here, do you want an empathy hug?
 
Lotus

Lotus

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from the times we spoke, you certainly don't seem like an awful person. just someone suffering and in a lot of pain. your situation is very difficult, unfortunately. I don't have much advice there :(
here, do you want an empathy hug?
Thank you so much for your support, and I'll gladly have a hug. You're very kind. My mom wants me to shake it off, but since I'm an emotional mess I just end up crying and suffering more.
 
Silver

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I get it's really hurtful when you receive criticism, especially when you're trying your best. But this is the first time you've been complained about since JUNE - which suggests, on the whole, you're doing a good job :-)
 
Lotus

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I get it's really hurtful when you receive criticism, especially when you're trying your best. But this is the first time you've been complained about since JUNE - which suggests, on the whole, you're doing a good job :-)
Thank you for saying that. I will try to have that in mind. I just feel that I've been put in the dark for 4 months and then suddenly it turns out that I'm not doing my job properly. :'( I feel sad and ashamed.
 
Silver

Silver

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Thank you for saying that. I will try to have that in mind. I just feel that I've been put in the dark for 4 months and then suddenly it turns out that I'm not doing my job properly. :'( I feel sad and ashamed.
I really think someone would have said something before now if you were doing something wrong.
 
Acopia

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I work in a hospital also, and totally agree with the female-dominated environment. There’s always some sort of bickering going on.

My advice, keep doing what you’re doing. Keep offering help, don’t do anything you’re not competent to do. You’re doing nothing wrong.
The haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate.
Don’t be so hard on yourself!

Love,
-Acopia:heart:
 
RoseyBird

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It sounds like you care about your work, and you’re trying hard to do it well. Some people just look for things to complain about there coworkers, and one phone call is just a nudge to preform differently. I‘m sorry you’re dealing with this, sending you hugs.
 
Acopia

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PS. You’d always be welcome to help me out with my patients. I love it when the med students get stuck in! I’m rushed off my feet most of the time.
 
Underscore

Underscore

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Sounds to me like you are putting in the effort and trying to be proactive about it. maybe the nurse just gets annoyed with students? Dunno. But I think your Mum's advice sounds good. Stick up for yourself with your boss and show them that you mean business. If they have a problem with that, ask how they wish you to proceed maybe. Sounds like someone else's problem that they are making yours because it's easier to push you around. If that's the case, don't stand for it. As long as you are reasonable and diplomatic, a good boss will appreciate your candour. If they don't, then they are not a good boss.
 
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Lotus

Lotus

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I really think someone would have said something before now if you were doing something wrong.
I really hope so. Thanks for making me feel better. I just don't understand why the nurse couldn't just say something directly to me.

I work in a hospital also, and totally agree with the female-dominated environment. There’s always some sort of bickering going on.

My advice, keep doing what you’re doing. Keep offering help, don’t do anything you’re not competent to do. You’re doing nothing wrong.
The haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate.
Don’t be so hard on yourself!

Love,
-Acopia:heart:
PS. You’d always be welcome to help me out with my patients. I love it when the med students get stuck in! I’m rushed off my feet most of the time.
You're too kind, and thanks for understanding where I'm coming from. Thanks for all the nice words, and I'll try to hold on to that.

It sounds like you care about your work, and you’re trying hard to do it well. Some people just look for things to complain about there coworkers, and one phone call is just a nudge to preform differently. I‘m sorry you’re dealing with this, sending you hugs.
Thank you, I really appreciate it.

Sounds to me like you are putting in the effort and trying to be proactive about it. maybe the nurse just gets annoyed with students? Dunno. But I think your Mum's advice sounds good. Stick up for yourself with your boss and show them that you mean business. If they have a problem with that, ask how they wish you to proceed maybe. Sounds like someone else's problem that they are making yours because it's easier to push you around. If that's the case, don't stand for it. As long as you are reasonable and diplomatic, a good boss will appreciate your candour. If they don't, then they are not a good boss.
I will try to do that, thank you for your support and advices. Unfortunately the bosses are known for being unfair and cynical. For instance they tend to push people out of their jobs if they have many sick days. I have no rights in my job, so I'm out if the boss thinks I'm doing a crappy job.
 
k75

k75

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I'm sorry. It sounds like you're doing everything right and working hard. I can see why it upset you.

That's a weird thing to complain about. How are you supposed to know what needs done if you don't ask?? And how are they going to know what to do if there's no communication and you're just being a nurse ninja, stealth taking care of things? I'd think that would only cause confusion and slow things down. Seems like not asking first would be the thing that got complaints!

And if you aren't trained or allowed to do something, it's a liability issue for the hospital if you're out doing it. And you'd probably get in trouble, right? So ... I fail to see how this is a valid complaint at all. I think it sounds like you're being responsible and helpful, and that nurse just wanted to complain about something.

If you have to explain yourself, just say what you said here. You did what you could and asked when you could help. That isn't a bad thing.
 
GoodPersonEffed

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Sending lots of compassion for this challenging situation.

If I were in your position, I would talk to my advisor at the school.

From how you describe the situation, you're being scapegoated, the nurse is putting burdens on you that are hers and resenting you for it. It's her personality, her issues, that are the issue, and whoever called you is reinforcing that, so you're being locked into an impossible situation that focuses on you when it's not about you. You need to learn and not harm patients, and as @Acopia said, I think you need to stick with that for your own protection and that of the patients. If you change your boundaries, it won't improve the situation, it will reinforce it.

I've learned that if I know what I'm doing is best and stick to my boundaries and ethics, to be like a billy goat on top of a mountain that blandly won't budge no matter who runs up the mountain and charges at me, folks will change their approach. They'll try different tacts, but no matter what, if I don't budge, they'll either give up and move on to another target, respect me and come around, or push me out. If it's the latter, it's better to not be there anyway.

I've learned to not let fear, guilt or false obligation be what drives me, but let my own compass guide me. I don't gain anything of worth if I lose myself in the process. You're in a weak position in the environment, bit not in your self. You can keep your center strong, and hopefully your advisor can help, but if not, you'll gain so much more for life if you hold firm in spite if how hard it is.

This sucks, but it's one of those winds of life in dealing with other humans, whether positive or negative, that will eventually pass. If you don't let the winds change you, you can remain centered and your self with every new really bad or really great wind. Like folks who win the lottery and lose their center, or folks who go through a great loss and lose their center, they didn't have a sense of who they were in either situation. This is a shit experience, but a great life learning experience that is helping you exercise, connect with, and make stronger your center and your moral compass.

If that's not anything that serves you, no worries. Still sending compassion and supportive thoughts.
 
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Lotus

Lotus

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I'm sorry. It sounds like you're doing everything right and working hard. I can see why it upset you.

That's a weird thing to complain about. How are you supposed to know what needs done if you don't ask?? And how are they going to know what to do if there's no communication and you're just being a nurse ninja, stealth taking care of things? I'd think that would only cause confusion and slow things down. Seems like not asking first would be the thing that got complaints!

And if you aren't trained or allowed to do something, it's a liability issue for the hospital if you're out doing it. And you'd probably get in trouble, right? So ... I fail to see how this is a valid complaint at all. I think it sounds like you're being responsible and helpful, and that nurse just wanted to complain about something.

If you have to explain yourself, just say what you said here. You did what you could and asked when you could help. That isn't a bad thing.
Thank you for your understanding and kind words. I've cried a lot, talked a little more with my mom and sister, and ordered pizza. I feel exhausted, and I feel more upset, embarrassed and treated unfair. I will try to do as they say and then ask one of the nurses I get along with to be reference for me when I'm applying for other jobs. I just can't believe this is happening to me. I don't feel like I'm not doing my job properly. I enjoy working with the patients, but I'm not a big fan of the work environment.

Sending lots of compassion for this challenging situation.

If I were in your position, I would talk to my advisor at the school.

From how you describe the situation, you're being scapegoated, the nurse is putting burdens on you that are hers and resenting you for it. It's her personality, her issues, that are the issue, and whoever called you is reinforcing that, so you're being locked into an impossible situation that focuses on you when it's not about you. You need to learn and not harm patients, and as @Acopia said, I think you need to stick with that for your own protection and that of the patients. If you change your boundaries, it won't improve the situation, it will reinforce it.

I've learned that if I know what I'm doing is best and stick to my boundaries and ethics, to be like a billy goat on top of a mountain that blandly won't budge no matter who runs up the mountain and charges at me, folks will change their approach. They'll try different tacts, but no matter what, if I don't budge, they'll either give up and move on to another target, respect me and come around, or push me out. If it's the latter, it's better to not be there anyway.

I've learned to not let fear, guilt or false obligation be what drives me, but let my own compass guide me. I don't gain anything of worth if I lose myself in the process. You're in a weak position in the environment, bit not in your self. You can keep your center strong, and hopefully your advisor can help, but if not, you'll gain so much more for life if you hold firm in spite if how hard it is.

This sucks, but it's one of those winds of life in dealing with other humans, whether positive or negative, that will eventually pass. If you don't let the winds change you, you can remain centered and your self with every new really bad or really great wind. Like folks who win the lottery and lose their center, or folks who go through a great loss and lose their center, they didn't have a sense of who they were in either situation. This is a shit experience, but a great life learning experience that is helping you exercise, connect with, and make stronger your center and your moral compass.

If that's not anything that serves you, no worries. Still sending compassion and supportive thoughts.
Thank you so much for your kindness. It means a lot to me, and I totally agree with what you're saying. I would never overstep my competence level, and the nurse that complained about me pushed me a lot to do so. I will try to not let other coworkers get to me like this, but I'm struggling with it right now. Especially when my mental health is getting worse. I hope I'm able to get better and finish uni, and after that I'll hopefully be more respected in my job position. My sister, who is a doctor, told me a little about that. I'm very vulnerable when people treat me badly, but I will try to overcome it, and hopefully it will give me something in return. Thanks again for your kind and wise words.

I really appreciate everyone who has read and answered my thread.
 
Lotus

Lotus

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I'm still shaken up about the whole situation. I was just called to work an afternoon shift today (which was the type of shift I received complaints about), so my anxiety level is so high right now. I don't really want to work there anymore, but I have to because I need the money and the experience for a new job next year. I'm feeling so down and worthless that I don't know what to do. Still a couple of hours left to my shift starts...
 
L

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Hi you are definitely doing a good job. You have our support and your family’s support so hold your head high. Is there anything you can do to help keep your confidence high? In all seriousness, if you don’t usually wear eyeliner, put it on. It’s like armour. I read one article from a woman who said she was treated so much better when she wore make up.
I’ve been surviving bullying at work for six months while dealing with mental illness. Do not let them win. You are doing a great job. Also tell your manager that this nurse was trying to get you to do stuff you are not trained in and ask your manager’s opinion. They could decide a) not your job or b) to train you to help the nurses.
How they treat trainee doctors is barbaric. You are doing so well.
 
Lotus

Lotus

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Hi you are definitely doing a good job. You have our support and your family’s support so hold your head high. Is there anything you can do to help keep your confidence high? In all seriousness, if you don’t usually wear eyeliner, put it on. It’s like armour. I read one article from a woman who said she was treated so much better when she wore make up.
I’ve been surviving bullying at work for six months while dealing with mental illness. Do not let them win. You are doing a great job. Also tell your manager that this nurse was trying to get you to do stuff you are not trained in and ask your manager’s opinion. They could decide a) not your job or b) to train you to help the nurses.
How they treat trainee doctors is barbaric. You are doing so well.
Thank you for your kindness. I'm so beaten down that it's hard to keep a brave face, but I will try to hold on to what you're saying and treat myself nicely. I'm so sorry to hear about you being bullied at work for six months on top of mental illness. It sounds awful, and I don't know how you've survived that. Thanks again, it means a lot.
 
Acopia

Acopia

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Sending lots of compassion for this challenging situation.

If I were in your position, I would talk to my advisor at the school.

From how you describe the situation, you're being scapegoated, the nurse is putting burdens on you that are hers and resenting you for it. It's her personality, her issues, that are the issue, and whoever called you is reinforcing that, so you're being locked into an impossible situation that focuses on you when it's not about you. You need to learn and not harm patients, and as @Acopia said, I think you need to stick with that for your own protection and that of the patients. If you change your boundaries, it won't improve the situation, it will reinforce it.

I've learned that if I know what I'm doing is best and stick to my boundaries and ethics, to be like a billy goat on top of a mountain that blandly won't budge no matter who runs up the mountain and charges at me, folks will change their approach. They'll try different tacts, but no matter what, if I don't budge, they'll either give up and move on to another target, respect me and come around, or push me out. If it's the latter, it's better to not be there anyway.

I've learned to not let fear, guilt or false obligation be what drives me, but let my own compass guide me. I don't gain anything of worth if I lose myself in the process. You're in a weak position in the environment, bit not in your self. You can keep your center strong, and hopefully your advisor can help, but if not, you'll gain so much more for life if you hold firm in spite if how hard it is.

This sucks, but it's one of those winds of life in dealing with other humans, whether positive or negative, that will eventually pass. If you don't let the winds change you, you can remain centered and your self with every new really bad or really great wind. Like folks who win the lottery and lose their center, or folks who go through a great loss and lose their center, they didn't have a sense of who they were in either situation. This is a shit experience, but a great life learning experience that is helping you exercise, connect with, and make stronger your center and your moral compass.

If that's not anything that serves you, no worries. Still sending compassion and supportive thoughts.
Too right, don’t do anything that’s beyond your competence just to please others. Sod’s law it’ll go tits up, and even if it doesn’t you’ll have that same nurse running to sister complaining that you’re putting patient safety at risk, and that’s a big no no. You won’t have much of a defence. (I prefer it when other members of the team know their own boundaries, and if appropriate I’d probably teach you so that you can learn & can do it in the future).
That being said, don’t shy away from tasks that you can do, sometimes you have to prove yourself by starting at the bottom and working up - that’s just the hierarchy of healthcare.
-A. :heart:
 
Lotus

Lotus

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So I finally got the courage to call the head of the unit, and I don't know what to feel. My mom told me to be strong, and I tried that, but it's hard when you're met with so little respect. I told the boss that the shift went well, and that I received positive feedback from the nurses I worked with. I don't know if she was convinced or not, because she kept asking if I managed to fulfill my responsibilities at work. She said that I should keep take the shifts that I'm asked to do (I have a 0% contract), but she still wants to have regular talks about how it's going and if I'm doing things right. I feel like I'm treated like garbage, and that the work that I'm putting in to this job is not being acknowledged. I just have to give, and give, and give, and all I get in return is skepticism and being tested. This one nurse has really screwed me over, and I feel that it's so unfair that the boss takes her word for it.

I just hope that I get past this, and when I'm able to practice with my medical liscence I hope I'll get some more respect from the nurses. But now as a student I get treated like I'm nothing.
 
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SlowMo

SlowMo

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I'm so sorry that you're being treated like this @Lotus, politics should have no place in the workplace but unfortunately, that's not how it works in practice. If you're not part of the clique, or someone with more influence takes a dislike to you then you're the scapegoat. I don't have much to add to the advice you've been given above except to say keep a diary. Write everything down, good and bad that happens on your shift. It may seem like they will just dismiss it, but if ever this was to escalate to the point where you need to make a formal complaint about the way you've been treated - your diary is excellent evidence. It's also evidence of your professional competence. I keep detailed patient notes which gives me the confidence to know that if ever I need to justify my decisions to someone, I can do so. Keeping a written record (can be as simple as sending an email to yourself so it's time/date stamped) might help you build some confidence as well, if ever it's her word against yours, you've got evidence to present in your defence.

Anyway, you sound like an incredibly hard-working person. I'm sure that as you progress through your medical degree and are able to rise above the cliques you will be well respected and well-liked by patients and staff alike. Keep up the fight Lotus, push on through the difficult moments knowing that you're never going to give those unctuous morons the satisfaction of seeing you weaken and fail - do it for your patients and for the nurses who like and respect you, but respect your own limits as well. Don't burn yourself out.

I'm afraid I don't have anything more profound or practical to say, except to thank you for continuing to battle on not just through this awful pandemic but through the awful bullying you've received - you have my utmost respect.

Big hugs :hug:
 
woxihuanni

woxihuanni

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So I finally got the courage to call the head of the unit, and I don't know what to feel. My mom told me to be strong, and I tried that, but it's hard when you're met with so little respect. I told the boss that the shift went well, and that I received positive feedback from the nurses I worked with. I don't know if she was convinced or not, because she kept asking if I managed to fulfill my responsibilities at work. She said that I should keep take the shifts that I'm asked to do (I have a 0% contract), but she still wants to have regular talks about how it's going and if I'm doing things right. I feel like I'm treated like garbage, and that the work that I'm putting in to this job is not being acknowledged. I just have to give, and give, and give, and all I get in return is skepticism and being tested. This one nurse has really screwed me over, and I feel that it's so unfair that the boss takes her word for it.

I just hope that I get past this, and when I'm able to practice with my medical liscence I hope I'll get some more respect from the nurses. But now as a student I get treated like I'm nothing.
Try to move over to a job with a male boss. You are already fired, they are just dragging it out. If they know you to be without a man, that probably is a big part of their contempt.

If you will stay there, act like you've caught a man and he is calling you, waiting for you, etc.
 
Lotus

Lotus

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I'm so sorry that you're being treated like this @Lotus, politics should have no place in the workplace but unfortunately, that's not how it works in practice. If you're not part of the clique, or someone with more influence takes a dislike to you then you're the scapegoat. I don't have much to add to the advice you've been given above except to say keep a diary. Write everything down, good and bad that happens on your shift. It may seem like they will just dismiss it, but if ever this was to escalate to the point where you need to make a formal complaint about the way you've been treated - your diary is excellent evidence. It's also evidence of your professional competence. I keep detailed patient notes which gives me the confidence to know that if ever I need to justify my decisions to someone, I can do so. Keeping a written record (can be as simple as sending an email to yourself so it's time/date stamped) might help you build some confidence as well, if ever it's her word against yours, you've got evidence to present in your defence.

Anyway, you sound like an incredibly hard-working person. I'm sure that as you progress through your medical degree and are able to rise above the cliques you will be well respected and well-liked by patients and staff alike. Keep up the fight Lotus, push on through the difficult moments knowing that you're never going to give those unctuous morons the satisfaction of seeing you weaken and fail - do it for your patients and for the nurses who like and respect you, but respect your own limits as well. Don't burn yourself out.

I'm afraid I don't have anything more profound or practical to say, except to thank you for continuing to battle on not just through this awful pandemic but through the awful bullying you've received - you have my utmost respect.

Big hugs :hug:
Thank you so much for your warm and kind words. It means a lot. Since the boss wants to have further talks with me about this, a diary is actually a really good idea. Thanks for your advice. Really beaten down at the moment, so I appreciate everyone that has taken their time to read and support me in this situation. Much love. :heart:

Try to move over to a job with a male boss. You are already fired, they are just dragging it out. If they know you to be without a man, that probably is a big part of their contempt.

If you will stay there, act like you've caught a man and he is calling you, waiting for you, etc.
Thanks for your advice. I agree that a male boss, or at least a work environment where also men works (this is a women only work environment), would helped to not get dragged into this kind of drama. Unfortunately, this is what I have to deal with at this point in my degree. In my last year I get more opportunities, and can work somewhere else. Hopefully even next year. I also see that the male students doesn't get treated like this by the female nurses, so it's just a frustrating situation.
 
woxihuanni

woxihuanni

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Thank you so much for your warm and kind words. It means a lot. Since the boss wants to have further talks with me about this, a diary is actually a really good idea. Thanks for your advice. Really beaten down at the moment, so I appreciate everyone that has taken their time to read and support me in this situation. Much love. :heart:



Thanks for your advice. I agree that a male boss, or at least a work environment where also men works (this is a women only work environment), would helped to not get dragged into this kind of drama. Unfortunately, this is what I have to deal with at this point in my degree. In my last year I get more opportunities, and can work somewhere else. Hopefully even next year. I also see that the male students doesn't get treated like this by the female nurses, so it's just a frustrating situation.
Lord, I wish you the swiftest escape from there. I wish you all the strength with this mob.
 
lonelymountaingirl

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My mom is a nurse and I know from her stories how hard an environment anything medically-related is.

I also want to complement your decision to enter that field. It takes a special and tough person to do the work you do and I commend you for that, even if you’re just entering. It is a job my brittle spirit simply couldn’t handle and I have a lot of respect for anyone who chooses it.

There is a lot of compassion in medicine—but not towards the other professionals therein and I understand why that is but wish that there was.

I can sorta empathize with your situation, though the pressure levels between your field and mine are hardly measurable they’re so different but the overwhelmingly-crushing embarrassment of getting Told by a super about something is a thing I absolutely understand.

If nothing else, it has been an important lesson for everyone involved and I’m certain that when the next situation like this comes (it’s medicine—of course it’s going to happen again,) everyone will be better prepared.

The fact that you didn’t just resign means a lot and speaks of your character and passion for the job and think you’ll have a good career in this, how ever long you choose to make it.
 
Ren Elsie Jewelria

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So basically some sheeple b*tch tried to cr@p her sh!t all over you. It doesn't mean you need to feel down about yourself. She already forgot about it, so you should definitely stop hurting about it, it's not worth it.
 
Lotus

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My mom is a nurse and I know from her stories how hard an environment anything medically-related is.

I also want to complement your decision to enter that field. It takes a special and tough person to do the work you do and I commend you for that, even if you’re just entering. It is a job my brittle spirit simply couldn’t handle and I have a lot of respect for anyone who chooses it.

There is a lot of compassion in medicine—but not towards the other professionals therein and I understand why that is but wish that there was.

I can sorta empathize with your situation, though the pressure levels between your field and mine are hardly measurable they’re so different but the overwhelmingly-crushing embarrassment of getting Told by a super about something is a thing I absolutely understand.

If nothing else, it has been an important lesson for everyone involved and I’m certain that when the next situation like this comes (it’s medicine—of course it’s going to happen again,) everyone will be better prepared.

The fact that you didn’t just resign means a lot and speaks of your character and passion for the job and think you’ll have a good career in this, how ever long you choose to make it.
Thank you for your understanding. It’s been a week since the call, and I’m feeling slightly better, but I still feel kinda embarrassed when I have to work again. Thank you so much for your support, and I’m sorry to hear that you can relate to some of my experience. I really appreciate what you say in the end. I wanted to just crawl up in my bed and stay there forever after that first call from my boss, but thanks to you all in this community and my mother and sister, I’m still standing at least. So we’ll see how it goes.


So basically some sheeple b*tch tried to cr@p her sh!t all over you. It doesn't mean you need to feel down about yourself. She already forgot about it, so you should definitely stop hurting about it, it's not worth it.
I think you’re right about that. She forgot it the moment she told the boss about it, and here I am scattered in pieces. Thanks for your kindness and support. I will try to do that.

Thanks again for all the love I have received. It truly means a lot to me.
 
Lotus

Lotus

Veteran
Joined
Dec 17, 2019
Messages
165
So I was asked to do three shifts this weekend, and already after the first one I feel dead inside The next shifts starts in a couple of hours, and my migraine is bursting. Who do you guys think I'm working with? Yes, the nurse that complained on me. I tried to be strong, but yes, I cried all the way home after the shift. Since it was Friday, the management was still at work when I came in yesterday, so I took the chance and talked to the head of the whole department (the boss to my boss, and the one that hired me). She told me that she knew that I was called about this complaint, but she hasn't heard anything herself about me not doing my job properly. She trusted me that I would take the feedback that I got, and that she wants to offer me the same job position next summerm and said that I also can apply for a higher position in February (which is what I want). Without me saying anything she also told me that the unit used to be all nurses, and no medical students, and that the veterans are more comfy with shifts with nurses only and that some people never can be satisfied. I don't know if it was a good idea or not to talk to her, but I'm at least a little more calm when I think about getting a higher position next year and get the freak out of this work environment.

Sorry for lots of updates. I just need to get it out somewhere.
 
GoodPersonEffed

GoodPersonEffed

Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
Joined
Jan 11, 2020
Messages
6,586
It sounded like a good talk, I think. This kind of threw me off:

She trusted me that I would take the feedback that I got
What feedback did you get?

You don't have to say or explain anything, and I know I could go back and read earlier posts, but I'm curious as to how you interpret the original messages you got if they're framed as feedback. No worries if you don't want to respond.

Sending support.
 
Lotus

Lotus

Veteran
Joined
Dec 17, 2019
Messages
165
It sounded like a good talk, I think. This kind of threw me off:



What feedback did you get?

You don't have to say or explain anything, and I know I could go back and read earlier posts, but I'm curious as to how you interpret the original messages you got if they're framed as feedback. No worries if you don't want to respond.

Sending support.
She was very vague and just said it in general terms. I perceived her as being diplomatic, and "feedback" is a safe and gently word to use I guess. That's what I got from it at least. She didn't say anything about my work, but I told her about the call I got and she went quickly over to my future work situation and the general work environment when students are around. I don't know if that answers your question.
 

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