Discussion Being a virgin still in your 30's

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PaYo

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Im 29 and soon ill be 30, and as you can imagine i am a virgine. I have never been with a woman, had bj twice and thats it.

Thats the partial reason for me to kill myself. I think i have no social skills, but as i know psychology it might be just believe - not true. When i was younger i had huge social skills. Now i just am surround with toxical people whos relation with me made me sick, on my body and my soul. I think im not atractive for most of the girls. Im pretty handsome so i dont know what it is all about, so maybe it just money? I dont know maybe you will tell me.

I dont want to live. Every time i was rejected by my friends i end up shoting in my basement from my rewolwer thinking how it is to shot with it in my temple.

Now im considering SN. It is peacefull i think. It would be great for me. But how is your love life. Are you fulfilled?
 
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xXSarac3nSlay3rXx

xXSarac3nSlay3rXx

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Im 29 and soon ill be 30, and as you can imagine i am a virgine. I have never been with a woman, had bj twice and thats it.

Thats the partial reason for me to kill myself. I think i have no social skills, but as i know psychology it might be just believe - not true. When i was younger i had huge social skills. Now i just am surround with toxical people whos relation with me made me sick, on my body and my soul.

I dont want to live. Every time i was rejected by my friends i end up shoting in my basement from my rewolwer thinking how it is to shot with it in my temple.

Now im considering SN. It is peacefull i think. It would be great for me. But how is your love life. Are you fulfilled?
I’m in a similar boat to you, although I’m only 19. I’ve had a bj once but never has piv sex. Technically speaking, I don’t think you’re really a virgin if you’ve had oral sex. Maybe that’s just something I tell myself to make myself feel better though.
 
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PaYo

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I’m in a similar boat to you, although I’m only 19. I’ve had a bj once but never has piv sex. Technically speaking, I don’t think you’re really a virgin if you’ve had oral sex. Maybe that’s just something I tell myself to make myself feel better though.
I think you do
Go get a hooker. Fly to Southeast Asia if you have to. Sex ain’t all that great anyways
Hooker did not satisfy me. I was once and it didnt evet get hard.
 
Laststop

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If you've had two BJs I think you're not really a virgin. But I guess that's a matter of opinion. I'm almost tempted to say, "I really hope there's more wrong in your life to want to die." I mean, of course I don't hope that. But you might take a more existential outlook on it. The pressures of having sex are based on a value system of other people. Sex in of itself can either be good sex, or bad. It depends on what you want sex to be. But you're mentioning other people here, so it sounds like it comes down to the social stigma of not having sex. And that's no way to live your life. And it's certainly not a reason to want to end your life. So if it's a matter of being able to say you've had sex, save your money and hire a hooker. Be careful about it. But, you can honestly say you did. If you're wondering how to turn into "The Man," and have the ladies throwing themselves at you...good luck. I sure as hell have no idea how to make that happen, and it doesn't seem to be an easy thing to do. If anything, take comfort you're in good company. A lot of guys wish they could somehow be turned into a "chick magnet."
 
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I dont want to be a chick magnet i just want a girl that will love me, accept me who i am and fuck why the fuck girls have this fucked opinion about men that they have to accept me as i am. And themself has this unreachable expectation for men that they have to be fucked prince on white horse. Thats unfair.

Pretty little girl that have to be broken somehow and man have to rescue them from their shyness - thats what image of a woman i have. I dont know whats to do with it. Is that what i am atracted to? Is this even real?

Most woman this days are selfconciouss, brave and strong. Stronger than most of the men. So why the fuck hollywood, making this image of little broken sparrow?

I dont know what is real anymore.
 
Laststop

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I dont want to be a chick magnet i just want a girl that will love me, accept me who i am and fuck why the fuck girls have this fucked opinion about men that they have to accept me as i am. And themself has this unreachable expectation for men that they have to be fucked prince on white horse. Thats unfair.

Pretty little girl that have to be broken somehow and man have to rescue them from their shyness - thats what image of a woman i have. I dont know whats to do with it. Is that what i am atracted to? Is this even real?

Most woman this days are selfconciouss, brave and strong. Stronger than most of the men. So why the fuck hollywood, making this image of little broken sparrow?

I dont know what is real anymore.
Well I wish you well. Only you can sort this out for yourself, ultimately. Maybe look for better people in your personal life that are familiar with your circumstances to talk to? But, like I said, you're in good company not knowing what to do. Some people know instinctively. I think this is a forum of people who largely don't know. If we knew how to make ourselves happy, or connect with others, we wouldn't be here.
 
AlePizarnik

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It could be worse. I’m a female in my 30s ans I have only had terrible experiences with sex and relationships including being sexually abused at age 5 and my first relationship/sexual experience with a guy who was extremely violent. I wish I never has sex to begin with. I hope the guy who abused me as a child pays for it. The sick bastard had kids himself.
 
blanketyblk

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i know it's hard to understand, but sex really only makes up like 0.001% of your total life. it's not the be all and end all of life.. there are many many things i enjoy more than sex. truly. i didn't had sex for ages after my partner died. it was close to 9 years. it's not that important.. go find something you enjoy doing. and see where life takes you.. i'm not taking you out of CBT'ing just giving you a females point of view.

Hugs
 
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Thanks blanketyblk, i love you. I read your story so i know what are you talking about. Im almost crying writing this but im alone my life. I want a soul mate but the fuck how i have to find her if most os the women selling themself like their are perfect. Ideal photo, super interesting hobbys and other. I want a girl that is not perfect but no girl will confess to it. I think im the only one broken.

I like sci-fi, and most women i have meet preffer horrors. When somebody wil
Like me, its ofc lesbian. When i love someone its a internet friendship. Fuck life, i have more obstacles than i can overcome. Life is cruel.

I want true love. But i cant find it anywhere. And belive me im seaching
 
ThatsEnoughForMe

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I spent my teen years masturbating. When I saw the lovers walking hand in hand, I felt like shit. This was the case with most of my friends. I never had a girlfriend. I had sex with prostitues 5-6 times. Actually, I was handsome when I was young. There were so many girls around me who were interested in me. My self-confidence was zero due to mental problems and lack of money. As a result, my life was masturbated

Translated by Holy Google
 
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PaYo

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I have got you man, im masturbating like 2-3 times a day
 
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Sammybackflip

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Masturbating 2-3 times per day. My god. You are a machine.
 
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Maybe just chicks dont get me because of my harsh humour. I lately told my friend and "Make my this grace and please dont speak about orthography" but in polish it has double meaning. Grace in polish is "Łaska", but most of the poles dont write polish letters, and then "Łaska" is "Laska" and "Laska" mean blow job xD So i wrote. "Make me this blow job and please dont speak about orthography" xD
After that she did not respond xD
Masturbating 2-3 times per day. My god. You are a machine.
i did 7 times a day, in old days
 
ThriveOrDie

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Maybe just chicks dont get me because of my harsh humour. I lately told my friend and "Make my this grace and please dont speak about orthography" but in polish it has double meaning. Grace in polish is "Łaska", but most of the poles dont write polish letters, and then "Łaska" is "Laska" and "Laska" mean blow job xD So i wrote. "Make me this blow job and please dont speak about orthography" xD
After that she did not respond xD

i did 7 times a day, in old days
Is that a friend you know well?
 
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Yeah, super well. shell be fine i think there was other reason for not replying
 
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ThriveOrDie

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You don't need to be attractive to most girls, nor should you want to be. There are a lot of shitty people out there and probably half of them are women. Women are not saints. Some of them will use you and abuse you and that is a lot easier for a woman to do after she has V-bombed you. If you want a relationship you need to know what you have to offer and what you want (you may have to adjust your expectations based on what you have to offer), be honest about it and look for a woman who is also honest about her flaws. The women who are pretending to be perfect are the ones you want to run from. Use paid dating sites if you can. Most people on the paid sites are serious about finding a partner. I hear a lot of frustration from men I go out with regarding the dating scene. So well adjusted men with good social skills are having the same problems. I think it has to do with the moral degeneration of our society. Men and women both have become very shallow in general and are only concerned with how they can use each other.
 
wildmoon

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Payo, there's no shame in being a virgin, although I imagine it's a different pressure for guys, which is unfair. Life is just a damn pressure, with wanting to find a person and have a decent relationship. All the crap online and social media posts do not help. I agree with blankety, it's a small part of life and won't feel like such a big deal once you've done it. But yes, you have to get to that place where it's no big deal. And when you have not done it it seems like the biggest thing in the world.

Thrive is correct - there are shitty people out there and there are shitty women too. Do not base your opinion of yourself on them because there's nothing wrong with who you are. it's just damn tough out there.
 
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Life is sad. The worse thing there is out there is that there everyone lieing to ourselfes and everyone else everything is okay. But it is not. Idove to be bright. Happy. Good looking angel. I love this state of mind of fullness. Music bring it to me. Just that.
 
First loss

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If you are white just go to South east asia and find a wife there.
 
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Yup i have huge succes with thai ladys. But everything comes to money. Have you answear to this?
 
blanketyblk

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Thanks blanketyblk, i love you. I read your story so i know what are you talking about. Im almost crying writing this but im alone my life. I want a soul mate but the fuck how i have to find her if most os the women selling themself like their are perfect. Ideal photo, super interesting hobbys and other. I want a girl that is not perfect but no girl will confess to it. I think im the only one broken.

I like sci-fi, and most women i have meet preffer horrors. When somebody wil
Like me, its ofc lesbian. When i love someone its a internet friendship. Fuck life, i have more obstacles than i can overcome. Life is cruel.

I want true love. But i cant find it anywhere. And belive me im seaching
Hugs,

I should just point out. those girls who you see online who are perfect with the best photo's and hobbies and seem to always have there shit together. often times they don't, most of what you see online on social media sites is just a fantasy world the women are portraying. sure some of them live life like rock stars. but that is a truly teeny tiny section of people. most women are just your average girl next door. with the same boring interests that you have. and are just trying to get though the day without anything going wrong. us girls learn from a young age to only show you the best of us and to hide the parts that we don't want you to see. it's just part of growing up a girl.

if you do want to go find someone then you need to go where your hobbies and interests take you. because i am promise you. if you have a hobby/interest there are girls/women out there that share the same hobby and interest.

i recently joined a dungeons and dragon role playing group where i am. just cause i use to love playing it as a kid. and sure enough there is about 20 guys in the
group. but also 5 single women who like me use to play it growing up and wanted to experience it again.

but i know none of this is easy. life sucks for many of us. all we can do is roll with what we have been given..

sorry if it's coming across preachy. but you seem like such a nice guy and you just need to give you self a bit of a break and just go enjoy something for yourself and you may never know what could happen.

Hugs
Blanketyblk.
 
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PaYo

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if you do want to go find someone then you need to go where your hobbies and interests take you. because i am promise you. if you have a hobby/interest there are girls/women out there that share the same hobby and interest.
BEER for the Lady!

I LOVE YOUR ATTITUDE. Your word are so comforting. Pls talk to me more : )

and yes thats true, thats why i sign up for drawing course in my city. I talked to girl i liked. And guess what. she was taken... another failure.

So... yes... my life soon be over.
 
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Sammybackflip

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So you been to Thailand payo??
 
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Im 29 and soon ill be 30, and as you can imagine i am a virgine. I have never been with a woman, had bj twice and thats it.

Thats the partial reason for me to kill myself. I think i have no social skills, but as i know psychology it might be just believe - not true. When i was younger i had huge social skills. Now i just am surround with toxical people whos relation with me made me sick, on my body and my soul. I think im not atractive for most of the girls. Im pretty handsome so i dont know what it is all about, so maybe it just money? I dont know maybe you will tell me.

I dont want to live. Every time i was rejected by my friends i end up shoting in my basement from my rewolwer thinking how it is to shot with it in my temple.

Now im considering SN. It is peacefull i think. It would be great for me. But how is your love life. Are you fulfilled?

I have been with lots of women it's really not that great.
BEER for the Lady!

I LOVE YOUR ATTITUDE. Your word are so comforting. Pls talk to me more : )

and yes thats true, thats why i sign up for drawing course in my city. I talked to girl i liked. And guess what. she was taken... another failure.

So... yes... my life soon be over.

You're a loser, well done. It's would of been far worse if you did not even try.
 
deflagrat

deflagrat

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At least you can masturbate, I lost my ability to do that when I was about 22 (I am still a virgin). It sucks, because sex has always been important for me at a psychological level. You just have to learn to live with it, just as I learned to live without happiness or satisfaction in my life. It's not easy, and it usually takes time. In the meanwhile, it's normal to feel like you just want to die, so try to postpone it if you can.
 
Wayfaerer

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I’m in a similar boat to you, although I’m only 19. I’ve had a bj once but never has piv sex. Technically speaking, I don’t think you’re really a virgin if you’ve had oral sex. Maybe that’s just something I tell myself to make myself feel better though.

My best friend's sister offered to blow me when I was 16 and I turned it down because he was my bro. I regret that 10 fold now because he probably wouldn't have even cared, but then again, how hard is that really to get anyway? I think it would've been better to get those experiences earlier on rather than later. KHHV and approaching 30.
 
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My best friend's sister offered to blow me when I was 16 and I turned it down because he was my bro. I regret that 10 fold now because he probably wouldn't have even cared, but then again, how hard is that really to get anyway? I think it would've been better to get those experiences earlier on rather than later. KHHV and approaching 30.
As I mentioned earlier, if you got the money, go to SE Asia. Thailand...Phils...You''ll find anything you want on soi 6
 
Wayfaerer

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As I mentioned earlier, if you got the money, go to SE Asia. Thailand...Phils...

I would if I had the money for travel. I'm only going to have 4-5 grand for the rest of the year. I don't have any bills, though.
If you've had two BJs I think you're not really a virgin. But I guess that's a matter of opinion.

It's simple. Did P go into V?

No? Then you're a virgin. Yes? Then you're not.
 
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