Are people sick of you because of your depression/suicidal thoughts?

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massiveblackhole

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So talking to people is supposed to be good for you if you're depressed. But I've pretty much driven away all my friends cos they're sick of my depression/suicidal thoughts and cant say i blame them. They dont seem to get though that depression is not like the chickenpox - you don't just get it once, recover and never have it again.

One guy i used to talk to cos he understood what it was like to have a mental illness (he was borderline) completely stopped talking to me after i divulged iv started having suicidal thoughts. Now im too scared to tell anyone else so im glad i found this site i can talk to people about it. Other friends stopped inviting me to things cos i was too depressed to go their parties.

Anyone else have a similar experience? Do you talk to anyone about your depression? Iv tried counsellors and they absolutely suck. Have you told anyone you're suicidal? i havent told the counsellors that cos im scared il lose my job - we have a counselling service provided by work but they said if you disclose harmful intent to yourself or others they have to report it to your boss. so thats bullshit.
 
SweetSurrender

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Yeah, I can relate. Some people think you're suicidal for the attention :meh: Its difficult. I tend to still quiet and not bother other people with my problems, mostly cuz they couldn't help me anyway. I would like emotional support and to vent from time to time. I'm in crisis right and people I thought would be there for me let me down. It makes you want give up. I'm tire of this life of giving but not receiving. I can't offer much as a friend I know, but I do help when I can. I'm stuck and I'm afraid there's no way out. I don't belong anywhere.
 
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MellowAvenue

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I’m sorry to hear you had to go through that. Friends need to be able to support one another as best they can even if it’s hard for them to empathize on the level you need them to to truly understand emotionally. They should never outright abandon you.

I have discussed my depression with a handful of people and, like you, lost a few people who I thought were friends because of it. I hate that depression has been so stigmatized that some people just aren’t comfortable even associating with someone who suffers from it even if they previously liked the person. I’ve never openly talked about my current suicidal problems with anyone, but I have admitted to having them years ago to a few people, I just say I “got over it” though to avoid accidentally saying too much.

I will tell you, though I don’t know if this will be of any comfort to you, I’m fairly certain if they tried to outright terminate you due to suicidal thoughts I’m pretty sure you could take some form of legal action, especially if they know you suffer from a pre-existing mental illness. I haven’t really looked too deeply into it though I’ve been meaning too since I’ve been curious about it myself. I would be worried that they may try to force you into a psych ward though.

Anyway I hope you find the help you need, and some more supportive friends, whether it be here or out in the real world.
 
iftheworldwasending

iftheworldwasending

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yes, actually. just got back from someone's house who i considered to be my best friend and found out she was telling people how annoying i am and how much of a bother i am to her and everyone. really helping my CTB date move up a bit faster.
 
All washed up

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Due to coronavirus restrictions I've hardly seen my friends for months so that's made a difference.
I mentioned suicidal thoughts months ago to my Mum and sister but they disregarded them.
My sister advised me to talk about my depression with her whenever I wanted but got fed up after a month and told me she doesn't want to hear anymore as she has her own problems
 
Shero

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Yes, it is unfortunately the case that people tend to reject you if they cannot understand your problems, or there is only a tolerance threshold until rejection occurs.
A person may find it difficult to empathize with someone if they do not identify with similar difficulties.
The consequences are therefore mostly alienation and/or separation of a relationship.

Mental disorders are also a complex issue because many people cannot grasp a non-material problem. Therefore, many people tend to feel more compassion for people who present physical illnesses.
Of course now, there is more awareness for mental disorders. Although in my opinion, the stigmata will not change for many people until they themselves are confronted with them, which furthemore reinforces my first paragraph. So the cycle continues.
 
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Merlay

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Hi. I’m sorry you feel that way. Though, I can relate, girl. I stopped talking to my friends because of how this head of mine works. I stopped expecting them to see things my way. You’re not alone in this fight. We’re in this shitty hellhole together. Let’s try to get out! ☺️ And I hope things get better for you soon.
 
Going Home

Going Home

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Yeah, I can relate. Some people think you're suicidal for the attention :meh: Its difficult. I tend to still quiet and not bother other people with my problems, mostly cuz they couldn't help me anyway. I would like emotional support and to vent from time to time. I'm in crisis right and people I thought would be there for me let me down. It makes you want give up. I'm tire of this life of giving but not receiving. I can't offer much as a friend I know, but I do help when I can. I'm stuck and I'm afraid there's no way out. I don't belong anywhere.
I can relate to you. Anyone who thinks a person becomes suicidal for attention should go fuck themself. Emotional pain is real!
 
BLUE1970

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I don't talk about my intent (with exception of here), most people don't get it unless they have experienced or are experiencing the same. My employers were fantastic following my last failed attempt, set up counselling (which I didn't want but I went through the motions) and they took really good care of me putting in many provisions in my work space and allowing me to work reduced hours on full pay for a period of time (until I was ready resume full activity)...losing my job due to the attempt was never on the cards, they just wanted me to 'get better' ha!
 
ecmnesia

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from my perspective, truth is... nobody cares. you see, life is already demanding for "normal" people and I can imagine that dealing with a depressed/mental ill person who doesn't seem to ever get better no matter the effort you put in to listening or advising them it's quite tiring.

I think that people outside of this environment, those that are not "mental ill" themselves, struggle to realize what it means to be like this, it seems to be a common conception among them that those feelings are nothing but temporary and superficial, therefore they cannot understand how could it be that someone lives with it 24/7, every single day of the year, and then... they just leave us. I've seen that people usually expect me to get better as they do expect someone with a cold to suddenly get cured, and it's just not like it... mental illness in general are not as easily manageable as bodily diseases, they lack a material substract, that can't be grasped or directly deal with. meds can help of course, but unlike bodily diseases they are not all it takes, cause mental illness are related to different types of mental processes I believe, it is as if we see the world through a different lenses and that's not something easily fixed, if it even can be fixed at all.

I'm sorry you are going through this tho, I know how painful that is, and even tho it's not the same, at least you have a community of people who think among the same lines as you and also been through somewhat the same.
 
opiatedreamz

opiatedreamz

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i really don't tell many people about my issues. anybody i have told, some listen, some ignore. it hurts the most being ignored about it, though. they just move on and pretend you never spoke a word about it. it does feel entrapping. like you can speak to people you trust all you want, but nobody seems willing to listen because they'd rather talk about other, light-hearted things. some people just don't want to hear your sadness. that's why i avoid any conversation about how i feel usually unless i know someone cares to listen at all.
 
BPD Barbie

BPD Barbie

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I've lost so called "friends" through being depressed, they said they couldn't handle the drama I bring to the table so cut me off or communicate with me only on the odd occasion. I stopped talking to people about my problems after these experiences, I just feel like a burden and like they view me differently.
 
Sprite_Geist

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No they are not tired of me because of my suicidal thoughts - they are just tired of me. Plus I have not told anyone about my suicidal thoughts because I am mostly quiet, and I do not like others knowing what goes on in my (boring) life. Not that they would care anyway.
 
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Symbiote

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Depression or not, people are tired of me. My existence, my physical presence, as another meatbag wasting resources, etc. Lost friends over depression, religion, and taste in metal music. They always say after discharge to find a good support system. I found my support system a year later in a suicide forum. They always said find a good therapist. I fired all my therapists after they judged me as the problem. I hear what they say, I understand them, but it's not like I can flip a switch overnight. A lot of tough love that borders on psychotic recklessness. I'll see myself out soon. I'll disappear. I'll board a bus going one way and never be seen again.
 
degeneratewaste

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I feel as if they are, but they wouldn't tell me that. I constantly post about my urge for death and how depressed I am. they used to check in, but now it's become so normalised that they stopped asking any more. I'm just a depressing person to be around.
 

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